Well, Cinderella was great -- very entertaining! It was funny and sweet, and the best part was listening to the little girls behind me who were amazed at everything, who loved Cinderella's voice, who laughed hysterically at Rachel (so much so that they even sounded a lot like Rachel! :) ), who "ooh"ed and "aah"ed at the lit up carriage and the transformation, who were dressed like Cinderella in their little blue dresses and bows, etc.

With that said, I have to also add that I HATED being in the audience!! I did not like walking in the front doors, sitting in the yucky and uncomfortable FHS auditorium seats, or anything else about watching the play! Of course, it was NOT because any of it was awful -- I just would much rather be on the stage and be one of the people doing the entertaining. I found that I am not an objective audience member either; no matter how hard I tried, I could not see the characters, only the people who played them. I found myself thinking about what the cast would have made jokes at; I could see Scotty's touch all over the play, and I tried to figure out all the way through what was actually written in the script and what he added; I spent the whole night, in short, placing myself at rehearsals in my mind and knowing what was said and done and laughed at and worked on forever and what key phrases were used (liked "fromp, fromp" and "fooshie-fooshie," "trot, trot, trot," and "pod" and all the others!). It all made me feel very sad and left out; I decided that if I was ever unable to do a play again I would not be able to go see it either!!

OK, all that aside, congratulations wonderful cast! You made me proud and did a great job!

Friends are friends forever...

I just found out that one of my best friends has a blog as well; mostly she posts about her mom's illness and radiation treatments. But I accidentally came across the blog and was filled with such nostalgia for my hometown and long-time friends. I have lots of wonderful friends here, but there is something so sweet and special about having people in your life for ALL of your life who know you as well as you know yourself and with whom you do not have to say a word to know exactly what the other is thinking -- even after not spending time with them in YEARS! I have a couple of friends like that -- we have been best of friends since we were about 5 years old (Yes, that was a LONG time ago) and have been through fights, boyfriend problems, sickness, family crisis and death, laughter, stress, driving mishaps and police stops, scavenger hunts, home appliance malfunctions, beach escapades, more laughter, and all sorts of things in between. What I really miss is the laughter! My best memories involve Paula and Anita and silliness, pure and simple. There is probably not one thing that would be funny to anyone else but they bring tears to my eyes and a smile to my face just thinking about those times! I wish I had friends like that here; I love all of my friends so much, but I do not think there is REALLY one person here who knows exactly who I am, what I like, what I think, etc. -- not even my husband, and that makes me a little sad. I guess as adults we get so wrapped up in our jobs, families, hobbies, etc. that we just come to adapt to one identity; at least that is what I feel like sometimes. Some time ago I guess I stopped being Kathi and became my kids' mom, my husband's wife, the teacher, the person in the plays, the person in the choir who sings occassionally, and whatever else I am. I feel a little lost sometimes as just me. I thank God, though, for the wonderful friends He has given me, both from many moons ago to those I am just beginning to know.

I just wasted a few more minutes looking at other people's blogs, and I feel so out of touch and sad that I am not in any of those pictures or even know what the characters are really saying!! I really miss being in Cinderella -- not because I have nothing else to do and am sitting home bored, but because I really miss hanging out with the people in the cast, going to Shoney's at closing time, laughing at the little quirks and sayings of the director and others in the cast, finding the littlest things funny, getting all nervous before going on stage, knowing everybody else's lines and songs except my own, being back stage and quoting the lines with the actors on stage, the pre-show meetings with everyone, hearing the audience laugh the first night and know that all the work was completely worth the effort, seeing all the costume and characters gradually come to life during tech week and dress rehearsals, and so much more! I can't wait to see the show -- I know it will be great and, in the words of OMT, "magical"! Break a leg, everyone! You will be GREAT!!

There are many parts of my job that I like, but there seem to be more and more that I dislike. One thing that I never thought I would say in my life is that I really have come to hate reading! I love to read, but I am so tired of reading books to teach in the future, reading things that I am currently teaching, reading essays, reading tests, reading research papers, reading AP tests, reading supplemental works to go along with what we are reading, and reading, reading, reading. I think that is why I haven't checked my blog and posted for so long -- I really do not want to read another thing. The only reason I am on the computer right now is that I am avoiding reading 3 sets of essays, a very long test with all "short" answer questions, and a set of first drafts of research papers. Luckily, my classes are small this time, so it really only amounts to about 60 papers total, but I still can't work up enough energy and desire to even start. I then feel guilty that I am being lazy, but I just feel like crying when I think about grading them!!!!!

And again...

WOW! I really have to stop starting my blogs with "It's been a long time!"